Next stop...BROADWAY!

Addison had her first experience being in a musical. I was so proud of her. She even had two lines. It is in her blood and she can not wait to be back on the stage! The acting bug has bitten her! Love her so much!!!

Happy Birthday to the best Nana!!!!

I wanted to wish my Nana a VERY Happy Birthday!!! She reminds us a lot that if it weren't for her this family would not be here. She is an amazing Nana who constantly makes us smile and makes us all feel like we are the most important when we are in her presence. I hope she has an amazing day and weekend! WE love you so much! My kids are lucky to have you as their Nana! 💜

Happy Birthday to my 5 year old!!!

It feels like just yesterday that this little peanut was laying on me. I could cry when I think about how fast the past 5 years has gone and all we have been through. If I think about it too much, Austen should have a little 8 month old brother here to help him celebrate. He was cheated out on that and I will never forget that. He is the best brother to Addison and I know he would have been the BEST big brother to Jayden. Austen was such a miracle and I am forever thankful that he is my son. He is the sweetest little boy who always tells me he loves me just when I need to hear it. He cuddles me at all the right moments, which is EVERY moment and he is just a mama's boy. How can this sweet little boy be 5 years old!?!? I honestly didn't think this day would come as quickly as it did. I remember just snuggling him as a newborn and here he is 5 years old. I love you so much Austen Michael and wish you the best 5 year birthday ever! I love you more than you will ever know!

Welcome to the neighborhood..

We just recently had new neighbors move in across the street that should I say are...normal.  We have been in this house since early 2006 and have always wanted to have neighbors that were around our age. I think Addison was just as excited as we were. She spent this past Saturday afternoon playing with her new friend for 4 hours. This family only has one kid who happens to be in Addison's school and she is the sweetest thing. I am already looking forward to summer when the kids can play outside and go between our house and their house. I had so many wonderful memories playing with the neighborhood kids. It was so nice to have friends that lived so close. I wanted to welcome them to the neighborhood with a nice "Welcome" gift. Jay thought it was a little much, but I know that I would have loved it if someone would have done that for us. What is wrong with bringing a smile to someone's face? I know where we live in a society that I feel everyone just keeps to themselves and aren't as willing to go out and meet people in their neighborhood. I get that, it is a different time that is for sure. I am just so thankful to have some new neighbors.

I am Enough!

I just watched the movie Moms Night out! Wow what an amazing good movie that was. The movie made me laugh, cry and just feel normal. I could relate well to the main character Ally. She was a mom with kids that was constantly trying to be enough for her kids and husband. She was also trying to be the perfect women she thought she should be.  I love how honest this movie is. I mean seriously how often do we beat ourselves up about every little thing.

-Did we feed our kid the best meals?
-Is our kid watching too much TV?
-Is our kid getting enough attention?
-Are we being the best wife we can be?
-Is the house clean enough?
-Look at that mom creating all these fun indoor activities for their kids, maybe I need to figure out more ways to entertain and educated my kids??!?!
-I need to prepare a nice meal for my husband every night
-I should participate in my children's school more
-Why don't I look like her?  She gave birth to 4 kids and looks that good?!? WTH

There are many days where I don't feel like I do enough for my kids. I, like Ally have always wanted to be married and to be a mom. This was my dream. I couldn't wait to have kids. There are just some days I feel like I am not doing a very good job at it.

There was a great line, well actually many great lines from this movie, but one that really stood out. Trace Adkin's character said this to Ally "It's beautiful to watch one of God's creations just doing what it was made to do. Ya'll spend so much time beating yourselves up. I doubt the good Lord made a mistake giving your kiddos the mom he did.  So you just be you, he'll take care of the rest."

Wow, right! I mean that line says it all.  Why is it that us moms tend to think we are not enough, because you know what if we weren't doing what we do things would fall apart! We are the ones that make our family run and stay on track. Think just for a second all that you do during the day from the moment you wake up till you go to sleep...I, for one can think of so many things I do between that time that if I didn't do them the day would be all out of sorts.  I think it is important to remember that WE are Enough, YOU are Enough!

The New Normal

I came across this today and boy is it the truth. I feel like some of my friends feel like well enough time has passed I should be back to who I was.  After losing Jayden I became a person I never knew, a totally different person, mom, wife. I will never be that same person again. I still have so much anger. Why is this my reality ? Somedays I wake up thinking surely this can't have really happened to me? I had already had two miscarriages, why on earth did I have to go through this and lose my precious, perfect baby boy??

Christmas pictures

Here are some of the many pictures from Christmas this year!