I thought I would share all about the first time I became a mom. I still to this day can remember what I felt the moment Addison was born and she is almost 4 years old now. The morning of her birth I remember how excited and scared I was at the same time. I thought how I can I feel both of these different emotions all at the same time, but then contractions started coming stronger and I knew where the scared part was coming from. I always thought that I was always too scared to have children, mainly because I was afraid of the whole childbirth part. I then realized it was the unknown that I was afraid of which come to find is totally normal. In walks my new best friend, the Anesthesiologist. I mean seriously who isn't scared of a big needle going into your spine, but the relief I got from it was worth all that other stuff. Throughout the day I was more relaxed all thanks to my new best friend, but then later come to find out I wasn't dilating at the rate the doctor would like me to so they decided to give me something else to help with the dilation and by doing that I started feeling contractions again...something was wrong with this picture. Who comes to the rescue my new best friend, just a little more medicine to ease the pain. Okay for some of you out there you may think that I am a little weak, but you know what...I don't care what you think it was worth it!
I am now only dilated to about a 7 and I had a long way to go. The doctor comes in to check and come to find out my little girl is sunny side up so he is thinking a C-section is the way to go. I of course start crying because I have never had surgery in my whole life and the only thing that was coming into my mind were scary deliveries I had seen or heard about. I knew though I had to be strong for my baby and for my family, by this point I had everyone else crying too. By the time we got into the OR and got all set up I felt some pulling and here was my little girl. I immediately felt the strongest love that I have ever felt. I became numb to any pain that I had felt before or during, it was all worth it as I met my precious baby girl. It is also amazing on how as soon as the baby is born you forget all the pain you had went thru. In that amazing moment I became a superhero. I now was given a brand new name...mom.
I was in recovery for awhile, but I couldn't wait to meet my little girl. My mom couldn't wait to see her oldest child as I hear my mom busting her way back to the recovery room to see me. We were both so excited of course, but I was a little out of it due to some pretty heavy pain medications. By the time I got to the room I couldn't wait to hold my little Addison and of course share her with my family. Jay and I were able to have our first family moment as the 3 of us. Amazing feeling. My family waited outside the door patiently until we let them in and it was great seeing my mom and dad's face as they became grandparents for the first time. My sisters were so excited to be aunts and their smiles couldn't have been bigger. I have to say though the part that made me realize I was a mom was when I was able to nurse Addison and it was just me and her. When she would look up at me my heart just melt. This bond is something that noone else can experience. It is amazing that it has been almost 4 years now that she was born and already we have a little boy. We are so blessed. Jay was an amazing supporter to me thru everything and even though he was nervous, who could blame him, he was the best husband to me and for that I am forever grateful.
This is already a very long post so I will talk about Austen's birth in another post.
No comments:
Post a Comment